Life Beyond JAG
by Crittab
Summary: When Harm's little sister moves in with him, thing's change between him and his closest friend.
1. Unexpected Guests

Darkness had just overtaken the busy Washington city. In the midst of the hustle and bustle of people busily trying to get home after a long day at work, there was a girl. She wasn't too tall, but wasn't short either. She had brown hair that reached down just below her shoulders. She looked to be no more than 14 years old. Her dark eyes scanned the area, looking for one building in particular.  
  
Finally she spotted it. She ran across the street to the large apartment building. Once there she scanned the list of names of the people who lived inside. Finally finding the correct name, she pressed the button signaling the person inside that she was there.  
  
"Commander Rabb," Answered Harm.  
  
"Hey, Harm, can you buzz me in, it's Ellison,' She said.  
  
"Ellie? What are you doing here?" He asked.  
  
"Listen, I'll explain everything once I'm inside, but at the present moment, there is a very creepy looking man eyeing me, and he may jump me any minute, so if you could." She was about to go on, when the door opened.  
  
"Come on up Ellie," Harm said.  
  
Ellie happily complied and ran through the doors. She was met at the stairs by Harm who pulled her into a hug.  
  
"Come with me," He said as they ended the hug. She complied and followed him up the stairs to his apartment. Once they were inside she set down the bags she had been carrying and looked around, only to be pulled out of her reverie by Harm's voice.  
  
"Honey, what are you doing here, where are mom and Pat?" Harm asked.  
  
Ellison's breath caught in her throat at the mentioning of their names.  
  
"Umm, that's why im here. Mom and Pat were in a car accident, they didn't make it," She said. Hot tears stung her eyes but she fought them back. She never showed emotion in front of people unless it was happy. No one knew how saddened she was, and she was determined to never let anyone ever know.  
  
"Oh, Ellie, I'm so sorry," Harm said, engulfing her in a hug. She put on a smile and laughed a little bit.  
  
"No, Harm. I'm the one who should be sorry. Mom and Dad made you my legal guardian when I was born. So you're stuck with me. Umm, for the last few days' I've been stuck with people who take care of kids who lose their parents, until their new guardians come to adopt them. They said they would give you one more day, and then I would be put in a foster home. So I came to find you. I don't want to go to a foster home," Ellie said. She fought back more tears. She was so afraid Harm would send her away.  
  
"Well then, tomorrow, I'll sign some paper's or whatever. As for tonight, let's get you set up in the guest room," Harm said. He sensed that she really didn't want to talk about anything right now.  
  
"You have no idea how much this means to me. I've really missed you Harm," Ellie said.  
  
"I'm surprised you remember me, I haven't seen you since your seventh birthday," Harm said, a little disappointed in himself.  
  
"I could never forget you. Your my big brother," She said. She hugged him once again before following him into the spare room.  
  
"Honey, I have a friend, she's part of the big sister's group. The kid she hangs out with, Chloe, you might like her, would you mind if I gave her a call?" Harm asked.  
  
"You know what, I'm really tired, I think I'm just going to go to bed. But thank you for asking," Ellie said.  
  
"No problem. Sweet dreams, kid," Harm said. He began to walk out but was stopped by Ellie's voice.  
  
"Harm, Thank you for not making me leave," She said.  
  
"Anytime Ellie," With that Harm left the room. He went to the phone and called Mac. It was the only thing he could think to do.  
  
"Hello?" Said the voice on the other end.  
  
"Hey, Mac, it's Harm," Harm said.  
  
"Hey, what's up?" She asked.  
  
"I just got some really bad news," Harm said. His voice cracked a little. It shocked him that his mother and stepfather were dead, it had only just begun to sink in.  
  
"What's wrong?" Mac asked.  
  
"My mom and stepfather died in a car crash a few days ago," Harm said.  
  
"Oh, Harm, I'm so sorry, are you alright?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yeah, I think so. My sister has to stay with me now. When she was born my parents made me her legal guardian in case of their deaths. They didn't tell me," Harm said. A single tear made it's way down his face, but he quickly fought back the tears, after wiping away the lone one that fell.  
  
"Is she alright?" Mac asked.  
  
"She seems okay. But she is a Rabb," Harm said. That statement needed no explanation.  
  
Mac had seen Harm hurting before, but only once had she seen him cry, when Bud was saved after having his leg blown off. Other than that, she had only seen him gloomy, and sad.  
  
"I can try to talk to her after I meet her," Mac said.  
  
"I thought she could talk to Chloe, they are close to the same age, and I think it might help to talk to someone her age," Harm said.  
  
"Okay, well next time I see Chloe I'll try to bring her over," Mac said.  
  
"Thank you Sarah," Harm said.  
  
"So were going by my first name now?" Mac asked, trying to lighten the mood.  
  
"Will you come over for dinner tomorrow, you can meet Ellie then," Harm asked, ignoring Mac's attempt at humor.  
  
"Sure, I'll see you tomorrow Harm, I'm really sorry about your parents," Mac said.  
  
"Thanks again Mac, Goodnight," Harm said. He was about to hang up when he heard Mac say something else.  
  
"You get a good night's sleep. And make sure you check on Ellie," Mac said.  
  
"Will do, bye," Harm said.  
  
"Bye Harm," Mac hung up the phone.  
  
Once Harm hung up the phone he decided to go to bed. It had been a long, eventful night. On his way he checked in on Ellie. She looked ot be sound asleep. Satisfied that she was okay, Harm went to bed.  
  
An hour later Harm was awakened by Ellie.  
  
"Harm, can I stay in here for a little while?" She asked.  
  
"Sure honey, you okay?" He asked. He moved over to allow her room in the bed. She crawled in.  
  
"Yeah, I just couldn't sleep, I'm fine," She said.  
  
"Okay, goodnight," Harm said. He closed his eyes.  
  
Ellie rolled over so her back was to Harm. She tried to sleep but couldn't.  
  
Harm could here light sobs beside him, he sat up and place a reassuring hand on her shoulder.  
  
"Do you want to talk?" Harm asked.  
  
"No, I'm fine," She said. Attempting to keep her voice from cracking.  
  
"Why are you crying?" He asked.  
  
"I'm not," She lied.  
  
"Ellie, you can tell me what's wrong.  
  
"I just miss mom, that's all," More tear's welled in her eyes. She tried to fight back the sobs, to no avail. Harm took her in his arms and held her while she cried.  
  
They stayed like that until Ellie fell asleep. Harm laid her head on a pillow and looked at the clock. It said 5:17 am.  
  
Deciding it would be pointless to try to sleep now, he made his way into the kitchen and poured himself some coffee, and ate some breakfast. He then hopped in the shower, hoping the steaming water would sooth his muscles.  
  
Today would be a long day. 


	2. The Admirals Order

"Harm, Mac, have a seat," said Admiral Chegwidden the next morning. The two officers sat in the seats opposite him at his desk.  
  
"I have a case for the both of you. About a week ago in Florida a man and woman were run off of the road. The police say a Navy officer was responsible for it. Commander Louis Hall has been charged with the murder of these two. They asked us to take care of it. Now, the reason I want you both is the daughter of the deceased has gone missing," He handed them both files.  
  
"Harm, your job is to defend the Commander, Mac, you have to find this girl. Her name is Ellison Bradley,"  
  
"Sir, what are the names of the deceased?" Harm asked.  
  
"Trish, and Patrick Bradley," The color drained from Harm's face.  
  
"Sir I can't work on this case, and neither can Mac," Harm said.  
  
"Excuse me Commander?" The Admiral asked.  
  
"Sir, the deceased are Harm's mother and stepfather. And the missing girl is his sister," Mac said.  
  
"Ellie ran away form the child care people and showed up at my doorstep last night," Harm further explained. A look of understanding spread across A.J's face.  
  
"I see. You will have to return Ellison to the proper authorities Harm," A.J said.  
  
"Umm, actually, I'm going to adopt her so she can stay with me sir," Harm said.  
  
"Until the adoption goes through, she isn't aloud to remain in your care Harm."  
  
"Sir my parents made me her legal guardian when she was born," Harm said.  
  
"Look Rabb, I understand that this must be hard for you and her, but we have to abide by the law's of our country. You have to return her to where she came from until everything has been worked out," The Admiral explained.  
  
"Understood sir," Harm said as he and Mad stood. The Admiral did the same.  
  
"Dismissed, and Harm, I'm sorry about your mother," A.J added.  
  
"Thank you Admiral," Harm said. He and Mac left the room and walked out into the bullpen.  
  
Harm walked into his office and was just about to sit down when Tiner walked in.  
  
"Sir there's a young woman asking to see you," He said.  
  
"Any idea who it is Tiner?" Harm asked.  
  
"A miss Ellison Bradley sir."  
  
"Send her in," Harm said. Tiner said a quick "yes sir" before leaving. A few seconds later Ellison walked in.  
  
"Hey Harm," She said as she walked in. She sat down at the chair in front of Harm's desk.  
  
"Hey, is everything alright?' He asked.  
  
"Uh, I just thought I would come down to see where you work, and hang out," She said. Just after she finished saying that Mac entered the room.  
  
"Hey, who is this?" She asked as she walked to the side of Harm's desk.  
  
"This is Ellie. Ellie, this is my friend Sarah Mackenzie," Harm introduced them to each other.  
  
"Hey," Ellie extended her hand and shook Macs.  
  
"Hi, how are you?" Mac asked, a little unsure of what to say.  
  
"Im okay, you?"  
  
"Same. So, how have you liked Washington so far?" Mac asked.  
  
"It's freezing up here, but the people are nice," She responded. Harm decided it was time to end the uncomfortable part of the conversation.  
  
"Ellie, Mac and I were going to go out to lunch, do you want to come with us?" Harm asked.  
  
"Who's Mac?" She asked.  
  
"I am," said Mac.  
  
"I thought you said your name was Sarah," Ellie said quizzically.  
  
"It is, people call me Mac because my last name is Mackenzie," Mac explained.  
  
"Why?" Ellie pressed on.  
  
"Well," Mac though for a moment, "I'm not sure. Why do people call me Mac Harm?"  
  
"I don't know, I guess someone made it up and it just stuck, anyways, would you like to come with us Ellie? There is something we need to talk about," Harm said.  
  
"Sure," She answered.  
  
"Good, let's go, I'm starving," Mac said.  
  
"What else is new?" Harm asked sarcastically. Mac ignored him and just turned on her heel and walked out of the office, followed by Ellie and Harm.  
  
".So Chloe went out with him, and when she came back she looked as though she had fallen in a puddle of mud. He took her to a skate park and tried to teach her how to skateboard. Needless to say it didn't work out very well between the two of them," Mac said. She laughed a little before taking another bite of her hamburger.  
  
"So when do I get to meet Chloe, she sounds nice?" Ellie asked.  
  
"How about I bring her over next time I see her?" Mac asked.  
  
"That would be great, I can't wait," Ellie said. She glanced at her watch.  
  
"Oh, I have to go, there's a movie coming on television that I wanted to watch. Ill see you later Harm," She gave him a kiss on the cheek. " Nice meeting you Mac," She said. With that she walked away.  
  
"She seems nice," Mac said to Harm.  
  
"She's great," Harm said.  
  
"You've been awfully quiet, what's wrong?" Mac asked.  
  
"Nothing, I'm just a little sad about having to send her away until the adoption goes through. You should have seen how scared she was last night when she thought she might have to go to a foster home," Harm said.  
  
"Are you worried about the adoption not going through?" Mac asked.  
  
"No, legally I'm obligated to provide for her now. I'm just worried that she will think I'm sending her away for good," Harm explained.  
  
"Don't worry Harm, she seems like a smart girl, I'm sure she'll understand," Mac said.  
  
"I'm not so sure. I mean, without warning she just lost her entire family except for me in one sweep. What if she thinks I don't want her?" Harm asked. He looked off into the horizon. Mac put her hand on his.  
  
"Harm, it's going to be okay, you'll both get through this. Don't worry about her, she's going to be fine," She said. Harm put his other hand on top of hers.  
  
"Thank you Sarah," He offered her a sad smile.  
  
"Anytime sailor."  
  
Harm got home around 5 that evening. When he walked in he found Ellie asleep on the couch with a book in her hands. He opted not to wake her up right away; he just took the book from her grasp and put on the table. He decided he would make dinner so it would be ready when she woke up.  
  
Half an hour later the aroma of potato's and chicken roused Ellie. She said up to see Harm in the kitchen putting food onto plates for the two of them.  
  
"Hey, how long have you been home?" She asked groggily.  
  
"About half an hour, I didn't want to wake you up," Harm said.  
  
"Thanks, I didn't sleep very well last night," She stood up from the couch and walked over to the kitchen.  
  
"Dinner smells great," She commented.  
  
"Thanks, umm, there is something we need to talk about," Harm said nervously. Ellie picked up a plate and walked over the table  
  
"Well then come sit down here and we'll talk," She said. Se noticed his discomfort.  
  
"What's wrong?" She asked once he had sat down.  
  
"I got an order form the Admiral to take you back to Florida until the adoption goes through," Harm said. He decided to skip any long explanation and just tell her what he needed to.  
  
"Oh, well I guess you better then," She said. She felt a growing lump in her throat, but tried not to sound too disappointed.  
  
"The adoption will go through Ellie, your only going to be there for a little while," Harm said. She smiled.  
  
"I know, don't worry about it, I'll be fine," She said. She was trying to convince herself of it more than Harm.  
  
"Good. I'm sorry you have to go back at all, but I'm glad you understand," Harm said. He seemed to be more relaxed now. He began eating his dinner again, and Ellie did the same, her attention though, was on the prospect of having to go back to Florida.  
  
Around 10 o'clock Harm and Ellie decided to go to bed. Once Ellie was satisfied that Harm was asleep she packed up a few clothes and quietly left the apartment.  
  
Hearing the knock at her door Mac got up from bed and made her way to the door, silently cursing whoever was calling at this time of night. She opened the door to a very distraught looking Ellie. She quickly ushered her in.  
  
"What's wrong Ellie?" She asked.  
  
"I couldn't stay there with Harm, he wants to send me back to Florida," Ellie said. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes but she fought them back. It was clear to Mac that she had been crying though.  
  
"Honey, does Harm know you're here?" Mac asked. Ellie just shook her head.  
  
"Listen, I have to call Harm. You stay right here, I want to talk to you," Mac said.  
  
About 5 minutes later she came back into the room Ellie was in and sat next to her on the couch.  
  
"Harm's on his way," Mac said.  
  
"Why did you have to call him?" Ellie asked.  
  
"Because if he woke up and you weren't there he would be worried sick. Listen to me, he doesn't want to send you back to Florida, but he has to. You wont be there for a long time, only until he can make it legal for you to be in his care, do you understand that?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yes, but." Ellie began.  
  
"No buts Ellie. Harm wants you to stay here as much as you want to, but you can' t right now. If he got caught with you he could get in a lot of trouble, and you would definitely be sent to a foster home, for a long time. I want you to truly understand that if Harm could keep you here for now and forever he would, but he can't," Mac said.  
  
"I understand Mac. I'm sorry I didn't before," Ellie said quietly.  
  
"Look, sweetheart I am so sorry that any of this is happening, and Harm is trying really hard to keep you happy. Please don't ever run away from him again," Mac said.  
  
"I wont, I promise," Ellie smiled a little. Mac gave her a hug just before being interrupted by the door.  
  
"You ready to go home?" Mac asked.  
  
"Yeah, thank you Mac," She said. Mac answered the door and Harm took Ellie back to the apartment. After sending her back to bed he made sure she was asleep before finally going back to bed.  
  
They were both going to need a lot of energy for the next day. Ellie was going back to Florida. 


	3. The Condition

The morning sunlight crept through the Phoenician blinds in Ellison's bedroom. She turned over so she was lying on her stomach and put her pillow over her head. She hoped if she didn't see the light of day it wouldn't really be there. She was brought out of that idea by Harm lifting the pillow off of her.  
  
"Hey, time to get up," He said. She turned onto her back and opened her eyes slightly.  
  
"Do I have to go back today?" She asked.  
  
"I'm afraid so," He said. He sighed slightly, but tried not to make his sadness evident in his voice.  
  
"I was afraid of that," She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed.  
  
"Honey, I'm sorry, I want you to stay here, you know that right?" Harm asked.  
  
"Yeah, I know, and I'm really sorry about what I did last night, it was stupid," Ellie said.  
  
"It's okay, what's important is that your back now, and your alright. Come on, get dressed and well get some breakfast on the way to the airport," He said, leaving the room.  
  
Ellie quickly dressed, but couldn't ignore the lightheadedness she felt. She hoped nothing would happen before she got to Florida. She regretted not telling Harm about her "condition", but she couldn't stand to see his face when he found out. She shook her head slightly to try to get rid of the nausea she felt before heading out into the living room.  
  
An hour later Harm and Ellie were in the airport waiting for the plane to arrive. Ellie had gone to the bathroom a few minutes earlier and still hadn't returned. Getting a little worried Harm stood and made his way to the door. He caught a woman's attention.  
  
"Excuse me, ma'am, could you go in there and see if a girl is still there? She has shoulder length brown hair and is about 5'7," He asked.  
  
"Sure," she said. She walked into the bathroom and ran out a moment later looking very pale.  
  
"I don't know if she's the same girl, but there is a young girl passed out on the floor," She said worriedly. Harm's eyes widened and he ran into the bathroom. When he was inside he saw a very pale Ellison lying on the cold tile floor. Her hair was sprawled out in all directions, and she was lying on her back. Harm ran to her side and checked her pulse.  
  
The woman had run in behind him.  
  
"Go call an ambulance," Harm ordered. The woman didn't hesitate before running out of the bathroom. Harm picked up Ellie and carried her out of the bathroom and laid her across the seats in the waiting area.  
  
About ten minutes later two paramedics and a police officer came into the airport carrying a gurney. They ran over to Ellie and put her on it. Two of them raced off with her while the officer one stayed with Harm.  
  
"What happened to her sir?" The officer asked.  
  
"I don't know she went to the bathroom, and didn't come back for a while, I got worried and went to check on her. I asked a woman to go in a check on her, and she ran out and told me that Ellie was passed out. I ran in and she was lying on the floor. I checked her pulse and brought her out here while the woman went and called you guys," Harm said.  
  
"Do you know of any illnesses she may have?" He asked.  
  
"No, she didn't say anything about being sick," Harm answered.  
  
"Was there any blood, or pills, or sign of struggle?"  
  
"No, none, can I go to the hospital now?"  
  
"Just a few more questions, how do you know her?" He asked.  
  
"She's my sister," Harm said.  
  
"Has she had lack of sleep, or any traumatic experiences in the last few days?" Harm hesitated.  
  
"Our umm. Our parents died in a car crash," Harm said.  
  
"Okay, I think we've learned enough about the situation. Do you need a drive to the hospital?"  
  
"No, I've got a car," Harm said. He ran out of the airport to his car. He then drove to the hospital.  
  
When he arrived he ran to the front nurses station and addressed the nurse who was there.  
  
"Ellison Bradley," he said. The nurse sifted through some papers.  
  
"Are you a relative?" She asked.  
  
"Yes im her brother," He said.  
  
"She's been placed in the children's cancer ward, it's just down the hall, fourth door on your right," She said.  
  
"Cancer ward?" Harm asked.  
  
"Yes sir, is there anything else I can do for you?"  
  
"No, thank you," Harm said as he made his way following her directions.  
  
He entered the specified room and sat next to Ellison's bed on a chair. He took her hand in his. The movement roused her.  
  
"Harm," She said in a weak voice.  
  
"Hey," He said in a whisper.  
  
"What happened?" She asked.  
  
"You passed out," He answered her.  
  
"Well, that's not fun," She said with a weak laugh. Harm couldn't bring himself to share in her humor.  
  
"Why didn't you tell me you had cancer?" Harm asked. He tried to fight back the tears that threatened to fall.  
  
"I guess this wasn't the best way for you to find out, huh," Ellie said. Her voice cracked.  
  
"How long have you been sick?"  
  
"A few years. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to worry. Please don't worry about me Harm. It really isn't all that bad, I just need to come for chemo every few days," She said.  
  
She tried to smile but it was immediately replace by a look of pain on her face from the pain that suddenly surged through her stomach. She gripped Harm's hand tighter.  
  
"It hurts a lot when that happens," She said. Harm bowed his head. He couldn't stand to see her in pain.  
  
"How bad is it," He asked, his voice cracking.  
  
"It's bad," she admitted. " They said I wouldn't survive last summer. But I'm still here, so I guess there's still hope," She smiled weakly. Harm couldn't hold the tears in. a few fell down his face.  
  
"Hey, don't cry. If you do I will and that wouldn't be fun." She reached up and wiped the tears from him face.  
  
"Why does all of this have to happen to you?" Harm asked.  
  
"It has to happen to somebody. I would rather it be me than someone else," She said. Her eyes began to droop.  
  
"I am so exhausted, it must be the drugs they gave me," she said, letting her eyes close.  
  
"Go to sleep. I'll be here when you wake up," Harm said. He felt her hand go limp against his as she drifted off to sleep. He pulled his hand away and let more tears flow.  
  
About half an hour later Harm couldn't take just sitting there anymore. It occurred to him that he had only taken half of the day off at JAG. He decided to call the office to tell them he wouldn't be in.  
  
"JAG headquarters, Lieutenant Simms here," Harriet answered.  
  
"Harriet, it's Harm."  
  
"Commander, where are you the Admiral is totally pissed. Well, he's very angry sir," Harriet said.  
  
"Look, Harriet, I need to talk to Mac, is she in?" Harm asked.  
  
"Yes sir, I'll patch you through to her office," Harriet said. She walked through the bullpen to Mac's office.  
  
"Ma'am, Commander Rabb is on line two for you," She said.  
  
"Thank you Lieutenant," Mac said picking up the phone.  
  
"Harm?" She said.  
  
"Hey, Mac, I need you to do me a few favors," Harm said.  
  
"Where the hell are you Harm, you missed the briefing, Chegwidden is extremely angry," She said.  
  
"Ellie passed out in the airport and she had to go to the hospital so that's where I am now. I need you to tell the Admiral where I am, then do you think you could come down here?" Harm asked.  
  
"Sure Harm, is Ellie okay?" Mac asked, the worry evident in her voice.  
  
"No, look I'll explain it all to you when you get here. Talk to you later," Harm said.  
  
"Bye, Harm," Mac said before hanging up. She immediately stood up and walked to the Admiral's office.  
  
"Tiner, is the Admiral free?" Mac asked the Petty Officer.  
  
"Yes ma'am, just wait a moment," He walked to the Admiral's office.  
  
"Enter," said the Admiral, answering the knock on the door.  
  
"Sir, Colonel Mackenzie would like to see you," Tiner said.  
  
"Of course, send her in," He said.  
  
"Sir," Mac addressed as she sat in the seat across form the admiral.  
  
"What is it Mac," He asked.  
  
"Harm called me. He's at the hospital with Ellie, she passed out at the airport," Mac said.  
  
"I understand. Is that all Colonel?" he asked.  
  
"Well sir, I was hoping you would let me take the rest of the day off to go to the hospital with Harm. He asked me to come," Mac asked.  
  
"Permission granted, dismissed," He said.  
  
"Thank you sir," Mac said. She offered him a quick salute before leaving the room.  
  
Half an hour later Mac entered the hospital.  
  
"Ellison Bradley please," She said to the nurse at the station.  
  
"Down the hall, fourth room on the." The nurse began, but was cut off.  
  
"Sarah," Harm said. Mac said a quick thank you to the nurse and went with Harm.  
  
"Is she doing any better?" Mac asked.  
  
"It's not a matter of doing better Mac. She has cancer. She hasn't had any of her med's, or treatments in over a week," Harm said.  
  
"Oh my god, did you even know she was sick?" Mac asked.  
  
"No, she never let on about it at all," Harm said. His voice caught in his throat and tears swelled in his eyes. Just thinking about it was difficult.  
  
"It's so unfair Mac. She is only a fourteen-year-old kid. She shouldn't have to suffer through cancer, or losing her parents. In the past week, she's had to do both," Harm said. Tears mad there way down his face, Mac reached up and wiped them away, then pulled him into a tight hug.  
  
"It'll be ok Harm. She doesn't have to do it alone. She has you, and me. You have me," Mac said. Harm put his arms around her tighter.  
  
"Please don't ever leave me Sarah," Harm said. Mac knew now he wasn't talking about their friendship.  
  
"I'll never leave you Harm," She pulled away, and took his hands in hers. "I love you," She finished. She gazed into the watery pools of his deep blue eyes. Harm leaned down and kissed her softly, and pulled her into another hug before responding.  
  
"I love you so much Sarah," He said. She let out a breath and sank into his embrace.  
  
"Harm?" Mac asked. "Let's go see your sister," She finished. They pulled out of the hug and Harm kissed her once more. This time a little more passionately. Then the two walked, hand in hand through the hallway, the rest of the way to Ellie's room. 


	4. The End and the Beginning

The following week passed slowly with frequent visits from various JAG staff, and from the child welfare service of Florida. Harm convinced them to let Ellison remain in his care, and with much complaining from the representative, he was granted custody. Mac had come to the hospital after work each day to be with Harm and Ellie. Since the day at the airport, Harm had only gone home to shower and change clothes. He had spent the nights in the hospital.  
  
"Harm, you can go home and sleep in your own bed tonight. I promise not to run away or die when your not here," Ellie said. She had been feeling a bit better that day, but the doctors were worried about her because she had gone so long without her medicine.  
  
"Don't be morbid," Harm said. Ellie laughed.  
  
"Just go home, Commander. Don't make me make it an order," Ellie said. She laughed as Harm poked her side, which was her most ticklish spot.  
  
"Of course not, ma'am," Harm said. "I'll be back tomorrow morning, don't you die on me," He said.  
  
"Now who's being morbid?" She said with a laugh. Harm stood up and left after giving her a kiss.  
  
He and Mac decided to eat in his apartment. For the first time in a week Harm wasn't eating in the hospital cafeteria.  
  
"This is really good. For a man who can actually stand to eat a corn dog, I must say you're a great cook," Mac said, taking another bite of Harm's stir- fry.  
  
"I am multi-talented," Harm said.  
  
"Well, don't let it go to your head flyboy," Mac said. She stood up and grabbed his hands and pulled him over to the couch. He leaned in and kissed her softly, before deepening the kiss. Just then the telephone rang. Harm and Mac pulled away.  
  
"Figures," Harm said, sighing loudly.  
  
"Just answer the phone squid," Mac said. She laughed lightly.  
  
"Rabb," Harm said when he picked up the phone.  
  
"Commander Rabb, this is Bethesda hospital calling. I'm afraid Ellison is very sick. She's dying. Her doctors don't expect her to make is through the night. She's asking for you," said the nurse. Harm's eyes widened.  
  
"Ill be right there," He said. He hung up the phone and looked at Mac. "Harm, what's wrong?" She asked. She could tell by the look on his face something was terribly wrong.  
  
"Ellie is dying," He said. Mac took a second to process it before running after him and jumping in his car with him.  
  
The arrived at the hospital about fifteen minutes later.  
  
Harm ran to the room she was in but found it empty. He ran to the Nurses station.  
  
"Where is Ellison?" He demanded.  
  
"She's been moved to the intensive care unit. On the fourth floor, room number 204," Said the nurse, obviously jolted by Harm's demanding voice.  
  
Harm and Mac ran up the stairs instead of waiting for an elevator. When they got to the room Harm looked inside and saw Ellie attached to a life support machine. He opened the door slowly and walked in. Mac decided to wait outside, and give the some privacy. She let tears role down her face.  
  
"Ellie?" Harm asked. He took her hand. She blinked her eyes open.  
  
"It wont be long now," She said in a low whisper.  
  
"Yes it will Ellie, your going pull through," Harm said. Fighting the tears away. He took Ellie's hand in his.  
  
"Harm, you don't have to protect me. I know what's happening. I'm to tired to fight anymore," She said.  
  
"No, Ellie, you're not. Please don't give up," Harm said. He let the tears run down his face.  
  
"I want to be with mom." She stopped and swallowed hard. " Mom and dad. They're waiting for me up there," She smiled weakly.  
  
"Your not going to die Ellie, not for a long time," Harm said.  
  
"It's. Slipping. It's getting dim," Ellie said. She slurred her words slightly.  
  
"No Ellie, you have to keep fighting."  
  
"I love you Harm," She said.  
  
"I love you too Ellie, but your going to tell me that a lot more in your life," Harm said. He refused to accept it.  
  
"Harm," She said. She couldn't die until she said everything she needed to. Then she could die happy.  
  
"Don't wait too long to marry Sarah, I'll be watching you with Mom and Dad," She said. Her words were less coherent now, but Harm knew what she was saying.  
  
" I wont, I promise," He said. She gripped his hand.  
  
"Im ready to go now. I'll hold onto your hand until I cant any more, then you'll know I'm gone," Ellie said in whisper. She smiled with her last ounce of strength.  
  
"Goodbye, Harm," She said. She closed her eyes and took in a few more labored breaths, and then she just stopped breathing altogether. A second later the beeping from the life support monitor turned to a steady wale, and he hand went limp in Harm's.  
  
"Goodbye Ellie," He said softly.  
  
Harm couldn't contain the sobs that crept out. He kissed her cold hand and laid it on the bed. He leaned over and kissed her cheek, and laid his head on her chest, and cried.  
  
Mac watched from outside. She too cried. Tears streamed down her face. She waited a moment before walking in the room and sitting on a chair beside Harm's.  
  
"I'm so sorry Harm," She said through her tears. He couldn't make himself talk. He just felt comforted by her hand on his back, and by the sound of her voice.  
  
Mac rested her head on his shoulder once Ellie's body had been taken away. They were in the waiting room. The Admiral, Bud, Harriet, and Sturgis all made there way over to them. They had decided to come, and see if there was anything they could do.  
  
"Harm," Harriet said, sitting next to him.  
  
"Hey," He said quietly. Harriet knew it was over. She had gone through it once before with her baby Sarah.  
  
Bud, Sturgis and A.J all lowered their heads. Harriet put hers on Harm's shoulder and cried.  
  
The six of them stayed there for about half an hour before everyone decided to leave. Most of them left because hospitals "gave them the creeps", some of them left just because they couldn't stand to be there anymore.  
  
Harm and Mac were the last to leave. They went back to Harm's apartment. After about half an hour of silence Harm finally spoke.  
  
"You know, she asked me to marry you. She said to do it sooner than later. I didn't know what to say at the time, but now, it seems like a waste if I don't," Harm said.  
  
"Yes it does. A lot has been wasted today," Mac said.  
  
"Thank you for coming with me."  
  
"Anytime, squid." Harm rested his forehead against Mac's.  
  
"Anytime," She repeated. More tears came to her eyes. She rested her head against Harm's chest and cried. They stayed together, and never wanted to be apart again. 


	5. Weeks Passing By

Weeks had passed since Ellie's death. They came with the constant reminders of what had happened. Each night Harm replayed Ellie's death in his mind. He was tortured by everything about that night.  
  
The only person who had seen him since Ellison's death was Mac. He had locked himself in his apartment for weeks. Mac worried about him. He had changed since that night. He kept to himself, and zoned out quite often.  
  
"Harm, you have got to get out of here. It's been three weeks and you haven't been anywhere," Mac said. She and Harm were in his apartment eating dinner.  
  
"I'm fine," was all he said.  
  
"No Harm, you're not. I'm worried about you," Mac said.  
  
"Don't worry, I'll be alright."  
  
"No you wont be Harm. Don't you get it? You're isolating yourself from the world, from your friends, from everything. It's not fair to you, or anyone else," Mac said. She was trying desperately to get him to understand.  
  
"You know what isn't fair Mac? It isn't fair that a fourteen-year-old kid had to lose her parents, and then die herself. It's not fair that I was left without any family. And it's not fucking fair that some Navy bastard killed my Mother and Stepfather. Life isn't fair Mac, not for me, and not for anyone else," Harm yelled. He couldn't control himself. After weeks of bottling up everything he exploded.  
  
"No, Harm, it isn't fair. But there is nothing we can do about it. You have to move on and get over it. You need to stop thinking about yourself and think about other people for a minute. I'll see you tomorrow," With that Mac left Harms apartment.  
  
Harm watched her leave. His heart sunk.  
  
"I can't do this anymore," He said aloud to himself. He walked to his medicine cabinet and pulled out a bottle of Excedrin and got out a bottle of wine. He sunk to the floor and took the drugs, and drank the wine. 5 minutes later he passed out.  
  
Mac realized she forgot her purse once she had made it to her car. She sighed loudly and ran back into the building and up to Harm's apartment. She knocked on the door. No one answered. She tried again, but again it remained closed. She turned the knob, pleased to find it unlocked. When she went in she grabbed her purse, and just as she was about to leave she saw Harm. In his hand he clutched a bottle of wine, and on the counter was an empty medicine bottle. He had passed out.  
  
"Oh my god. Harm," She said. She ran to his side and tried to wake him to no avail. She ran to the phone and called 911, then back to his side.  
  
"Harm, wake up. Please wake up Harm," Mac said. Tears filled her eyes. She felt helpless.  
  
An hour later Mac was in the hospital waiting room. The doctors had taken him into an operating room and pumped his stomach. He had stopped breathing three times, but was revived each time.  
  
At the present time Mac was pacing in front of the door when a doctor came out.  
  
"Colonel Mackenzie?" She asked.  
  
"Yes, is Harm alright," Mac, asked.  
  
"Ma'am, the commander overdosed on Excedrin, we pumped his stomach, which is about all we can do. I don't know if he's going to make it," Said the doctor.  
  
"What the hell do you mean you don't think he's going to make it?" Mac yelled.  
  
"Ma'am, the commander is very sick. I'll be surprised if he survived through the night. Were moving him to intensive care. Room 274, you can see him in a few minutes," With that the doctor walked away.  
  
Mac ran through the hallways to the specified room. When she got there she saw Harm being placed in a bed. He was attached to more wires than she'd ever seen in a person at one time. Her breath caught in her throat as she entered the room. She sat beside Harm and took his hand in hers.  
  
"Why did you do this Harm?" She asked his lifeless form.  
  
Hours passed, nurses came in and out of the room, checking to make sure Harm was still alive. Now it was just Mac and Harm. Mac was lying beside Harm on the bed. She had fallen asleep beside him about half an hour before. She woke up and got off the bed. She sat back in the chair and again took his hand. She closed her eyes and rested her head against the back of the chair.  
  
"Mac," Harm said in weak voice. Mac's eyes shot open and she looked at him. She leaned on her elbows, which she rested on the bed, and put both of her hands around Harm's.  
  
"Hey," She said.  
  
"I'm so sorry," He said softly.  
  
"You should be, squid," Mac said. She tried to smile but it failed.  
  
"Why did you take that medicine?" She asked. She couldn't hold in the question.  
  
"I was afraid that I lost you. I can't live without you," Harm said.  
  
"Well, what makes you think that I could live without you Harm? You almost took away from me the thing I love the most," Mac said. Tears filled her eyes and she tightened her grip on his hand.  
  
"I never want to hurt you Mac, please forgive me," He said. Tears filled his eyes also.  
  
"Your forgiven, but for your punishment you have to drink charcoal for the next few days. They had to pump your stomach because you OD'd," Mac said.  
  
"I would rather eat charcoal for the rest of my life than lose you," Harm said.  
  
"Don't speak to fast flyboy, I'm not worth that kind of torture," She smiled slightly.  
  
"Your worth everything Sarah," Harm said sincerely. Mac leaned down and kissed his cheek.  
  
"You better not pull a stunt like that again," Mac said.  
  
"Yes ma'am," Harm said with a weak smile.  
  
"You really suck you know that?" She said with a laugh. Harm returned the laugh.  
  
"I know, but you love me anyways," Harm said.  
  
"Yeah, I suck too," Mac, said.  
  
"So what's my diagnosis Dr. Mac?" Harm asked.  
  
"You're supposed to be dead Commander Rabb," Mac said.  
  
"Sorry to disappoint you," Harm said.  
  
"I'm sure you'll make it up to me when you get out of here," Mac said. She couldn't hide the innuendo.  
  
"Yes ma'am," He said.  
  
"You should get some rest. I want you out of here ASAP," Mac said.  
  
"I'll try my best," Harm said. Mac kissed him softly and he drifted back off to sleep, leaving Mac feeling much less helpless as she did before. 


	6. Special Events

2130 ZULU July 30, 2003 Mac's Apartment  
  
"Bugme or Rabb, who was 'the best'" Meredith asked. Harriet, Mac, Bobbi, and Jennifer Coates were all sitting in Mac's living room, at her surprise- wedding shower.  
  
"The best what?" Mac asked, feigning naiveté.  
  
"Oh, come on Mac, you know, 'the best'. Come on, who's the real tomcat when it comes to sex?" Bobbi asked. Mac gasped theoretically. It had been four months since Harm's attempted suicide, and almost five months since Ellison's death. Harm had proposed to Mac about a month before.  
  
"Ooh, that's a tough one," Mac said. Harriet glared at her.  
  
"I'm sure your having the most horrible time trying to figure out the answer, too," She said sarcastically.  
  
"Harm is so, so, so much better than Mic was. Seriously, Harm can keep it going for at least half an hour before even getting tired. Mic lasted about five minutes," She said with a laugh.  
  
"Really, maybe I should have held on to him when I had the chance," Bobbi said with a laugh.  
  
"So Mac, where's the craziest place you two have ever 'done' it," Jennifer Coates asked with a laugh.  
  
"Can I refuse to answer anything without a lawyer present?" Mac asked with a laugh.  
  
"You are a lawyer, now answer," Meredith said.  
  
"Fine, but I want the answers of every one these questions from all of you and your significant others. Okay, Harm and I did it on the admiral's porch once," Mac said. She received shocked looks from all of the other girls in the room.  
  
"Okay, well, I'll go next, A.J is the best I've ever had. He may be old, but that SEAL training lasts forever. And we once did it in his office over Christmas," Meredith said, the girls just looked at her.  
  
"Remind me to have that office sterilized ASAP," Harriet said with a laugh. "Okay, about a month after Bud proposed to me we did it on the kitchen floor, and Bud is the only man I've ever slept with so he's the best," She finished.  
  
"What about you Bobbi?" Mac asked.  
  
"Well, Sturgis and I don't really have sex in many places other than in bed," She said.  
  
"Well name one of those few other places," Harriet said.  
  
"Okay, we once did it in the SecNav's office after he left, and yes he's the best," Bobbi said.  
  
"You did it in the SecNav's office? Couldn't you get fired for that?" Jennifer asked.  
  
"Well, we didn't get caught," She said with a sly smile.  
  
"How about you Jen, do you have a boyfriend?" Meredith asked.  
  
"Well, no, not really," She said. Nervousness was apparent in her voice.  
  
"Come on Jen, who is it?" Mac asked with a smile.  
  
"It was nothing, I doubt it's going to go anywhere," Jen said, her face turning red.  
  
"Who is it Jen?" Harriet asked.  
  
"Jason Tiner, and he was so good," She said with a laugh. She shook her head and put it in her hands.  
  
"You slept with Tiner?" Mac asked, dumbfounded.  
  
"Yes," She said through her giggles.  
  
"I knew something happened between you two. Every time Tiner looks at you he looks like he's seen a Goddess," Harriet said with a laugh.  
  
"Really?" Jen asked, excitedly.  
  
"Yeah, I noticed that two, he practically worships the ground you walk on," Mac said, sincerely.  
  
"Aww, that's so sweet, hang on to that one Jen," Bobbi said.  
  
"Yes Ma'am," Jen said with a mock Salute.  
  
2130 ZULU July 30, 2003 McMurphy's Bar  
  
"So, Harm, is Mac any good in bed?" Sturgis asked. They were in the middle of throwing Harm's bachelor party. Bud, A.J Chegwidden, Sturgis, Gunny and Tiner were all there, along with a few of Harm's friends from flying.  
  
"Oh, come on Sturgis, you know Mac would kill me if I divulged any such information to anyone," Harm said, taking a swig of his beer.  
  
"Hey, I am only fishing for information, if you get killed in the process, so be it," He said, earning laughs from the other men around them.  
  
"How about you Sturgis, is Bobbi any good?" Harm asked, cockily.  
  
"Hey, at least you were only kidding about the murder thing, I would actually be running around headless tomorrow," He said with a laugh.  
  
"I hate to break up this little fairytale you guys are telling, but the stripper is here," Gunny said.  
  
"Oh, come on, you guys got a stripper?" Harm asked with a disgusted look.  
  
"Come on Rabb, live a little, you only have one night left to," A.J said, earning odd looks from all of the other men.  
  
"Hey, I got hitched less than a year ago, and my life has officially come to an end, isn't that right Bud," He defended himself.  
  
"Well, sir I would defend you, but if word got back to Harriet, I might not live to see tomorrow," He said with a laugh.  
  
"Come on Harm, it's time for your last official sexual act as a bachelor," Sturgis said. He took Harm by the arm and led him over to the tall slim woman who was leaning against a table in the corner.  
  
1400 ZULU August 1, 2003 Beach on the Atlantic Ocean  
  
Harm stood under the gazebo with his best man, Bud, and the usher Sturgis, and the Reverend. Dressed in his dress whites and gold wings, he had never been more nervous in his life. Harriet and Bobbi were on their way down the isle in between two rows of white chairs. Finally after what seemed like hours to Harm, Mac the corner onto the white carpeted isle along the beach, arm in arm with Admiral Chegwidden. She wore a long, white gown, which was strapless. It widened at the waist and reached her toes. Her veil reached down just below her waist. Her smile was what caught Harm's eye. It was more real than anything else Harm had ever seen. Finally she reached the gazebo, and stepped up in front of him, taking his hands in hers.  
  
"We are gathered here today to rejoice in the union of these two fine people, Sarah Elizabeth Mackenzie, and Harmon Michael Rabb. If anyone has any reason why these two should not wed, speak now of forever hold your peace," The Reverend began. Mac half expected someone to answer him, but was happy when no one stood.  
  
"Good, now Harm and Sarah would like to share vows, which they have written for each other, Harm," He said.  
  
"This was meant to be. It probably should have been a long time ago, but my own stupidity kept us both waiting. I'm amazed you stuck by me as long as you have. I've trusted you with my life, and you never failed to fulfill everything the marine core would expect of you. Only recently I trusted you with my heart, and you have yet to let me down. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with you," He recited.  
  
"Sarah," The Reverend motioned for her to begin.  
  
"I know this has been a bumpy ride. We've seen each other make huge mistakes in our lives, whether those mistakes are with work, or personal. Somehow, we managed to help each other through those mistakes, and we ended up here. I am happy we made every one of those mistakes; because now I know our love can withstand anything. I look forward to making more mistakes, and fixing them, with you," She said.  
  
"Now we will do the traditional exchanging of rings, Commander Rabb, place the ring on her third finger on her left hand and repeat after me. I give this ring to you as a symbol of my eternal love," He said.  
  
"I give this ring to you as a symbol of my eternal love," He said, as he slid the small ring on her finger.  
  
"Colonel Mackenzie, place the ring on his third finger on his lift hand and repeat after me. I give this ring to you as a symbol of my eternal love," He said.  
  
"I give this ring to you as a symbol of my eternal love," She said as she slid the band onto his finger.  
  
"By the power invested in me by the state of Virginia, I now pronounce you Husband and Wife, you may kiss the bride," He said with a smile.  
  
Harm smiled and leaned down to Mac. Taking her head in his hands he softly kissed her lips. It lingered for a moment before they broke it, smiled playing on their features. The two signed the marriage papers and ran down the isle hand in hand while dodging the rice and confetti, which was being thrown at the from all angles. The two dove into the white limousine, which was parked on the white sand and drove into the sunset, together.  
  
"I love you Sarah," Harm said once they began moving.  
  
"I love you too Harm," Mac said with a smile. Without hesitation Harm pulled her into a strong kiss, this time not ever wanting to break it.  
  
The End. 


End file.
